Pookie (my maid of honor) and I recently spent an hour on the phone with each other rolling our eyes over the ridiculously ugly bridesmaid dresses out there today. I’ve pretty much settled on navy, and I know I want them short. In truth, I’d rather do a metallic look but I think it might make some girls look gray and I also have the feeling that mass-produced gold or sequined bridesmaids dresses could turn out being the most terrifying thing ever seen on the East End of Long Island.

This is beautiful, but probably too much skin, no?

I want them to be something the girls will wear again. No, really, I do! The trouble with bridesmaid dresses though, is that they all seem so style-less. Boring, drab, unflattering. My bridesmaids are my six best friends! I want them to look and feel beautiful on my special day, because they’ve spent so much time over the years helping me feel great about myself. So, where to start?

Problemo Numero Uno: Moving to Dallas in seven days. Need at least a basic idea of what we are buying before then, so the girls can make their fitting appointments, etc in the months to come. Only free day on the calendar is this Sunday, and no bridal shop in Manhattan that is actually open on Sundays had availability for us. Uh-oh.

So, off to Manhasset we go on Sunday. There is a bridesmaid offshoot of a famed local bridal shop there, and it promises to have some styles we’ll like. Pookie and I have already selected our top five, but I have my concerns. My dress is whimsical and bohemian. This is not a blacktie wedding. Yet the only bridesmaids dresses that don’t make me want to vom are structured, darted, heavy silk cocktail dresses that would be perfectly acceptable at a blacktie affair.

Uh-oh again.

Problemo Numero Dos: The sexy, lacy cocktail dress with a touch of whimsy that I’m envisioning is a ready-to-wear piece by the likes of Milly, Anna Sui, or even Tracy Reese. Not only is this look too expensive a burden for my girls, it would be impossible to hunt down one cocktail dress in a variety of sizes and make sure that they were still available and able to be tailored in time for the wedding. OK, maybe not impossible. But really difficult, annoying, and stressful.

So, back to traditional bridesmaids we go…

I will post photos from our initial bridesmaid shopping adventure this weekend and then we can all discuss. I basically just want this:

If I could find a dress like this Alice + Olivia number ($550, saks.com) for my girls, I would be the happiest bride alive. Not gonna happen, Jensy. Move on!

It that too much to ask? In bridal world, apparently so.

And in closing, here are some metallic looks I’m using for inspiration (but don’t tell Pookie, she’ll freak out):

One shoulder with belt at the natural waist and a full tulle skirt is over-the-top fem and I love it. I believe that 5/6 of my bridal party would fire me though. ABS dress, $370, saks.com

And if it weren’t for the many sets of big boobs in my bridal party, I would LURVE to go with something like this ABS strapless gilded look. But again, they would hate me. ABS, $410, saks.com